i thought this was supposed to calm them down...

by "this" I mean that whole "neutering" thing you have to do to your puppy when they're around 6 months old. I mean, it wasn't much of a debate for us, there's all kinds of good reasons to have your dog neutered or spayed. I'm more sure, however, that, for us, the real reason we had Titus neutered was because we heard from several people that it supposedly calms them down a whole lot. Which, for us and Titus, was definitely a bonus, since Titus' regular daily adventures range from trying to wear my underwear (see previous post) to chewing every single one of D's flip flops to barking at his reflection in the patio door. If you get my drift, he's not exactly a calm dog sometimes and we were somewhat looking forward to having him a little more on the mellow side.

Until this:
This is what my side of the bed looked like last night after D. and I fell asleep in front of the TV and the "bub" (as he's affectionately called) was completely and totally unsupervised for about 15 minutes. My pile of books and magazines were completely destroyed; more specifically, the next book on my list to be read: The Birth House by Ami McKay. I was about ready to kill, as this is the only photo proof I have of how much of a PSYCHO Titus has been since he had his "hoo-hoos" cut off on Wednesday. I am not kidding you - the day he had his surgery, he went from giving us the cold shoulder for putting him through such a traumatic event to being a whirling dervish on a leash in less than two seconds. He flipped himself (literally somersaults in the air) for so long that D. and I just looked at each other - stunned. D. says, "But I thought...." Don't say it, honey; don't say it..... I thought so, too.

Anyway, back to Hurricane Titus in the bedroom. At least, as D. so nicely pointed out, he had the courtesy to stop ripping at the right spot:




Right at the beginning of Chapter One! Good Dog!


So since the "neutering" didn't do the job of calming Titus down (hardly worth the 400 bucks at this point!), today I returned to my old trick of taking him for a walk in the middle of a summer day - a one-way ticket to "calm and submissive dog". He enjoys walking, but he doesn't know how to pace himself; which means he strains at the end of the leash and pants like he's taking the last breaths of his life, appropriately enhanced by letting his tongue hang out so far that he'd put Gene Simmons to shame. So, I know that he's not close to death, or that he's not thirsty (because I just gave him a drink right out of a water bottle - how spoiled is that!) but that doesn't seem to stop at least two people per walk to tell me disapprovingly that he's clearly thirsty or tired, punctuated with a look that says, "Don't you know how to look after your dog, you imbecile?"

To respond: yes, I know how to look after my dog, people. I know how to look after my dog so well, that I'm completely concerned for his cultural well-being and today I brought him to the Ottawa River (see above) and the stone sculptures at Remics Rapids (see left). I'm pretty sure that if he wasn't so enthralled with the cultural experience, he'd be facing the camera and trying to eat it, or, more likely, scratching at the knapsack that's holding the water bottle so he could have a drink. So, I think I'm a pretty good dog parent, thank you very much, and I think he's going to be well-prepared for the demands of the world!



I don't think, however, that neither Titus nor I were prepared for this lovely vision:


To start, you have to fancy yourself quite the "hot tamale" to walk along the pathway by the Ottawa River in a string bikini and running shoes when the closest beach is a good 5 kilometres away. I know this is not a great picture, but I can assure you that this woman was not even close to my side of 40 (that would be the young side) and she was "digging her fine self" because she broke into a couple of dance-y "sashay" steps more than once along the way. I don't make it a practice to photograph women in bikinis, and I know it was 35 degrees today so a bikini is justified in the right venue, but this woman was so out of place here that she may as well have been naked in the middle of a convent, for God's sake. I'm sure all of those bike-riders, who almost rode their bikes into the river because their eyes were burned out by the sight of her, would whole-heartedly agree with me.

As our Pop Pottle would say, "Sacred Heart, woman, put some clothes on."

And on a final note... maybe Titus' operation DID work.

I don't even think he noticed her.